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Oaks Bottom Wildlife Refuge

Oaks Bottom Wildlife Refuge

I’ve been inside too long. It happens from time to time; the weather, work, general ennui keep me from getting out into the world. So when Beth called on Monday and insisted that we had to strike while the sun was shining, I couldn’t argue. That and the fact that she offered to make lunch for us. Lunch is always a clincher. She had heard of a recently renovated trail in a suburb of Portland. The area is called Sellwood and the trail is located in the Oaks Bottom Wildlife Refuge.

This is yet another thing I love about this corner of the world. Open spaces. Let’s face it, heading outside for a long walk generally means a lot of concrete and roadways.  The green around us is usually somewhat manicured – lawns, trees, landscaping. Pretty? Sure. But it is controlled nature; domesticated for daily use. Finding nature – real, unconstrained, feral nature? That’s a gem. And we have a lot of it around here. Stand in the middle of Forest Park in Portland and you could fool yourself into thinking that you were light years from civilization. Well, if you ignore the trail runners, dog walkers, and schlubs like me.

Discovery Park and Fauntleroy Park in Seattle have the same knack. The Hoyt Arboretum, also in Portland, is another. And so is Oaks Bottom.

There is some neatness about it, a little bit of that domestication. It arrives in the form of a neatly groomed trail replete with some raised, grated walkways (it is a wetland, after all), a nice observation area, some quaint wooden bridges and even a couple of nicely situated sitting areas. And yet even these amenities do not seem to diminish the wildness. Okay, there is one thing. There is a large – seriously huge – building that has attempted to blend in by way of some pretty murals of wetland birds on the trail-facing side of the bluff. I want to like it, but I found it a bit disorienting (this thing is several stories tall). Thankfully, it is easy to ignore if you want to, because there is all this wonderful river wetland just out there.

We watched lazy ducks dozing in the spring sun, looked hard for herons who were all doing a really good job of blending in to the landscape, marveled at wild violets and enthused over bursts of magenta, violet, and pink flowers that dotted the hillside. There were warblers and finches to serenade us, crows to heckle, and any number of breath taking views that seemed to appear out of nowhere.

I love that experience of silence that isn’t really silence. The sound of the wind in the trees, the birds, the rustle of undergrowth and of water in motion. The thousand little sounds that are easily missed in the hum of city life are symphony when you find them.

Beth noted that this is the sort of place you come back to in different seasons, as it will be different in summer, different in fall, different each time. Water will flood in and recede, birds will follow migratory patterns, trees will change colors. I have a feeling that we will be back, probably soon. Next time, perhaps, better prepared with all the gear – binoculars, cameras, a map…

We need green spaces, open spaces, access to nature. We need them on a fundamental level. We need the noisy silence of them, the grand spaces, the feel of earth under our feet. We need them in ways that are primal. I am deeply grateful that I live in a place that gets that. That understands how such places feed our souls.

Going Solo

In Paris on my first trip overseas.

Paris – on my first trip overseas. Taken with my little Kodak point and shoot, from the top of the Arc d e Triomphe.

I mentioned in a previous post that I am, by and large, a solo traveler. I like going with my friends, don’t get me wrong on that, it is just that as a single women with a lot of married friends the choice is either go it alone or don’t go. And not going just isn’t a choice for me. It really isn’t that big a thing in my book and yet the response I get when I mention that I have gone somewhere alone is one of surprise. “Really? By yourself? I don’t know how you do that!” is a pretty common thing.

How I do it is sort of a mystery to me as well. Maybe it is because I had a couple of good role models. A good friend, Susan, was forever haring off on solo adventures and coming back with the best stories of people she had met and things she had done. There were also some negative role models, to be honest, the trips from hell that friends talked about. The travel companion who won’t eat anything but McDonald’s, or the one who wanted to do nothing but go to bars until 3 am and then sleep the day away, or – my personal nightmare – the one who threw tantrums when unable to do exactly what they wanted.

It can get lonely, I won’t lie about that. I have the cell phone bills to prove that after two weeks alone I just want to talk to a friendly voice back home. Skype takes care of that little wrinkle now, thank heavens. There are times when a view, an experience, a meal,  is just so incredible that you dearly wish that there was someone there to share it with you. And yet I have found that if you look around, there is someone. Just maybe not someone you’ve met yet, but what better way to meet someone than that shared sunset, that amazing meal, that shared love for the Albert Memorial?

And then there are the folks who are sure that you are dooming yourself to great harm and violence. “Isn’t it scary?” they ask, or “Do you think that’s safe?” Yes, sometimes it can be a little scary. Getting lost can, I admit, induce anxiety. But then there is the feeling of triumph when you figure it out. I have gotten lost in many, many places and lived to tell the tale. There are the myriad of tales about scam artists, pick pockets, crooked cabbies and cops, and far worse. I have found that carrying myself with confidence, not needing to take everything I own with me, and just paying attention short circuits pretty much all of it. The woman who ‘found’ the gold ring she was sure was mine, but then offered to sell it to me? Yeah, that was amusing. The guy who did the same thing 30 feet later? Merely annoying.

Not to mention that most places are filled with people more than happy to help out in a bad situation. Fortunately I have never been in real danger, but I have been helped by a lot of strangers. The vendor in Paris who shooed away the guy who was following me, trying to convince me that I should go to dinner with him, that was amusing.  Being taken off a bus in London a week after the second set of attacks on public transport should have been more frightening, and would have been if my fellow passengers hadn’t seemed so annoyed by the inconvenience rather than afraid of the threat. Stories that are amusing in retrospect but somewhat scary when they happened. But for all of that, being safe in a foreign country isn’t all that different from being safe here at home.

Out of all of my experiences the scariest thing was getting on the plane that first time. My brother Erik likes to remind me that sometimes the only way out is through. On that day, that evening of my first solo trip overseas? I nearly turned around to go home a dozen times. I even called Erik twice, I think, to have him talk me down. That trip changed everything for me. I think of the places I wouldn’t have seen, the things I wouldn’t have done, the personalities I wouldn’t have met, and I can only smile. Smile and plot the next trip.

Inspiration

I was chatting with an old friend the other day. Chatting in the way we seem to chat now, which is over the computer. There was nothing remarkable about the exchange, at least not until near the end. After we had done all the catching up and the asking after, we started talking about art. She likes to say she dabbles in pottery, though it really is more than dabbling. She talks a lot about making it her work but hasn’t quite made the leap. Lately she thinks that she is lacking in inspiration, and that is what holds her back.

It got me to thinking about the topic – inspiration. I feel pretty lucky that way, I live in a pretty inspiration rich environment. Outside my window is a near daily kaleidoscope, be it the landscape or the weather. Beyond that I have incredible natural vistas, I have access to a couple of spectacular libraries and a variety of pretty amazing bookstores. There is a rich cultural life in the northwest, from theater to food and wine. Then there are the people; the wine makers and craft distillers, the entrepreneurs, the public figures both famous and infamous; and then there are my friends. My friend isn’t exactly living in a desert of such influence herself, and yet that seemed to be her take on her situation.

So is inspiration internal or external? I think of the way we talk about the subject. We seek inspiration. We hunt for it as though it is some rare gem. We imbue objects with it – that painting is inspirational, the landscape inspires me. We seem to look at it as something that is purely external to us. That notion gave me pause. How can something that is so personal be not of us?

I think that the key to the thing is being open to it. To be willing to see it in unlikely places as well as the likely. Let’s face it, not everyone gets to stand in front of a Monet whenever they wish. Not everyone gets to hear the sound of a magnificent water fall or taste an exceptional wine. And not everyone who does have access to that is going to be inspired by such things.

Inspiration, it turns out, really is a part of us.  I suspect that we would have no real need to seek it because it lives in us if we wish, if we let it out of the box. Not just for the artists, either. It happens when we allow ourselves to do what we were born to do, I think. My friend is a gifted potter, she just hasn’t allowed  herself to be that. She has kept it as her hobby, as that thing she does on the side. Which makes me feel doubly lucky. Because I have found what I love in a place that I love. It is no wonder that I feel inspired as easily as I do.

Itchy Feet

It’s been a while since I took any sort of real trip. Trips home, quick trips to Seattle, but nothing substantive. As is evidenced by the last couple of posts, I’ve also been sorting and re-homing my pictures from past trips. The result is that I am itching to go somewhere. Somewhere far away. Somewhere that involves a passport, a guidebook and that wonderful sense of adventure that comes from someplace new.

My love of travel started when I was a little girl. Then the trips I took were in my head, and my Mom is to blame. I traveled to Prince Edward Island with Anne of Green Gables, I played on the Hungarian plains with the young cousins in Kate Seredy’s novels and I wandered across England with books by Joan Aiken and Francis Hodgson Burnett. As a young adult I craved books that took place elsewhere, even outer space. I dreamed of the day I would finally see just one of these places.

My first big adventure was the Caribbean and it was wonderful. I snorkeled, I hiked to the top of a black rock fort, and drank one too many Killer Bees at Sunshine’s on Nevis (advertised as a ‘rum drink’ it is basically Caribbean moonshine, fruit punch and a grate of fresh nutmeg, with a sting that will kill you) and by one too many I mean one total. It was a great time with good friends and I couldn’t wait for the next trip.

It would take six years and a promise to a friend who left this world far too soon. I had long talked about the trips I was going to take – next year. Roger had been to so many incredible places and his tales of his adventures were as thrilling to me as those books I read as a kid. The last time I saw him he told me that we never know if next year is going to come around, so I had better get moving. It rocked my world. I realized that I couldn’t keep waiting on others to save the money or get the vacation or have the same interest; I had to go on my own.

I still remember the feeling of walking through Heathrow for the first time. The noise, the crowds, the utter confusion. I still remember the train into Paddington Station, standing under a tree waiting out a rainstorm with a couple that didn’t speak a word of English, getting horribly turned around trying to walk three blocks to Hyde Park. A lot of things went wrong on that first solo trip, but most everything went right. And even the things that went wrong? I gained this wonderful confidence that even lost in Paris, lost in London (and since then lost in many other places…) I could figure it out – and probably end up finding something pretty amazing as a result.

I have been to some pretty amazing places since then. Some rather mainstream, a couple a bit off the beaten path. I have met some pretty incredible people as a result from the two women who travel three weeks every year while their husbands stay home, watch sports and eat take out (their words) to the barman at the hotel in Amsterdam who would sit and talk with me in the late afternoon. I have stood in a castle on top of an island that smelled of lavender and rosemary, danced in an underground club in Sarajevo, biked along canals in Belgium and wandered through Roman ruins on the banks of the Rhone river.

Each trip gave me just a bit more confidence, a bit more hunger. I still haven’t seen the Hungarian plains. I haven’t been wine tasting in Mendoza. Wooden churches in the eastern Slovak Republic beckon, as does the Charles Bridge in Prague. There is something romantic in the notion of seeing South Korea where my Dad spent a couple of years of his young adulthood and I wouldn’t mind trying soba noodles in Sapporo, Japan.

They are all trips that I want to take now; these and a thousand more.

 

Snapshots

Église Saint-Georges, Lyon France.

Église Saint-Georges, Lyon France.

I’ve been going through my pictures. The imputes for this was the musings of a friend who is a prolific and talented photographer. He mentioned the – I kid you not – tens of thousands of pictures he has taken in his adult life. I have, roughly, no where near that many myself. Sometimes I find that I get too caught up in where I am to remember to snap a photo. Or thirty. I try to settle for a couple of great pictures to remind me of a city, a trip, an adventure.

In doing so I found a couple of favorites, which I think will make up my blog post today. My mind is far away; dreaming of places not yet visited and not really ripe for writing. I have been doing a lot of armchair traveling thanks to Google Earth and my soul is too restless to sit at my computer staring at a screen for too long.

 

 

 

Street musicians taking a break on the Pont St, Louis, Paris.

 

The Harbor at Kinsale, Ireland

The Harbor at Kinsale, Ireland

Cherry blossoms

Cherry blossoms

The cherry trees started to bloom the day before yesterday. It always seems like there is this moment when BAM all the pretty buds burst forth; one moment nothing, the next a riot of pink and white. It has become sort of a spring ritual to look for it, to see if I can catch that moment. Of course I never get the exact moment, but I have gotten pretty good at getting close. We love our cherry trees around here, you are hard pressed not to find a picture of them in bloom or to pass by a stranger without one or the other of you commenting on the sight.

The trees are, in a way, a harbinger of the season to come. A reminder that spring is working hard at getting here. Right now, we are enjoying our typically indecisive weather – one moment sun, the next rain. One day in the sixties to be followed by a hard freeze that leaves the next morning a cold and sparkling frosty landscape; wind, big billowy and dramatic clouds. Spring is often associated with renewal; everything coming to life once again. I like the metaphor and I like that in this corner of the world that renewal rather mirrors the way change happens to us.

There is a line from one of my favorite movies, “Postcards from the Edge” where Gene Hackman tells Meryl Streep that real life isn’t like the movies. In the movies you have a revelation and boom, your life changes. In real life you have a revelation and it takes a few weeks before your life changes.  We like to think of change as something that happens overnight. Like the cherry trees. One moment bare branches, the next an abundant crop of dainty flowers. The reality is that it is more like our weather – one moment sun, the next rain.

I have mentioned before that some of the best wineries, the places I love most, make you sort of work to get to them. That there is something to be said for having to hunt a bit for the good stuff. The work you put in is paid off in what you find at the end of that road. But I think for most of us it too often feels like the good stuff requires more work than we have the energy to put into it. I am watching with friends struggle with jobs, with family, with trying to live the life they dreamed of and finding that dream always beyond their outstretched fingertips.

Maybe that is part of our fascination with the cherry trees. Their almost fragile beauty, the way they seem to burst forth into bright glory with ease; it is deceptive though, isn’t it? We know that the trees have to survive the winter, survive the freezes and the winds, have to dig deep to keep a hold of all that they need to live. For me that is the crux of it: transformation takes a lot of work. A lot of time and a lot of work. It just looks easy from the outside.

I am low on words at the moment. I am expecting a new shipment at any time, but at the moment all we have in stock are some remainders and tag ends. Hardly enough for a thoughtful and well rounded post. But as St. Patrick’s Day is tomorrow, I figured I could make up the deficit with some lovely pictures I took on the Hill of Slane in County Meath, Ireland. The tale goes that it was on this hill that St. Patrick lit the paschal fire to defy the pagan kings who were gathered on nearby Tara. It is also believed to be the burial site of Sláine mac Dela, king of the Fir Bolgs, the first High King of Ireland. Another legend holds that a healing well here – the Well of Slaine – was used by the fierce warriors of the Tuatha Dé Danann to heal their wounds during battle, making them nearly invincible. It is a mystical place, and I had the good fortune to visit on a misty, magical afternoonwith a tour guide who certainly had the Irish gift for telling a ripping tale.

The Abbey

A lone tree, seemed to capture the mystical air of the place.

A lone tree, seemed to capture the mystical air of the place.

Wonderful Celtic cross marking a grave.

Wonderful Celtic cross marking a grave.

And, of course, a statue of the man himself.

And, of course, a statue of the man himself.

 

 

Living Local

I’ve been reading a book, as I often do, and this one is about living in the digital age. It was given to my by Beth,  librarian extraordinaire (seriously, everyone should have their own librarian). It is a slim book that is eliciting a lot of thought from me. The second chapter, in particular, is hitting on something that I have long agreed with. It is about place, about how our digital age makes it easier to disconnect from where we live.

As I mentioned in a previous post, sense of place is important to me. We live in an age where everything is global, or at least it feels that way. On a trip to Dubrovnik, Croatia I kept thinking that something felt odd. I couldn’t put my finger on it for about a day, but something in the landscape of the place seemed askew. The second morning it hit me – no fast food joints. It was odd to see a skyline that didn’t have golden arches or a spinning bucket of chicken. I had left London twenty four hours earlier and on the way to the airport I had passed those two brands, Starbucks, and any number of such places. But now there were none. Not a single one. Granted, there were global brands; mostly those that are frequented by the upper end of the economic scale; but they were there.

Part of the joy of place for me is finding that local thing. That shop that exists only in this place. It is part of what makes local, local. I grew up with such places. There was Bertha’s, the home goods store that Dad went to for gifts for Mom (I have a much cherished teapot from there), there was the jewelry store that he frequented, there was the women’s wear shop that Mom loved, the butcher they frequented, all unique to that time and place.

Global is great, I am happy to shop on line for books, for clothing, for gifts – there is an ease to it, you can do it in your pajamas, over dinner, at 2 am. Shopping locally requires dressing, bathing, daylight hours. And so I am often torn. I live near one of the best independent bookstores on the planet; I live near one of the best wine regions on the planet; the grocery store that is in walking distance is one of a kind. I am fortunate to have a bounty of locally grown, locally produced foods, wines, spirits, beers, clothing, shoes. I love the connection to place that comes from shopping that way. I love that I get to know the people who are making, producing, creating these things. So much so that I am willing to pay a bit of a premium to do it.

Again, I’m lucky in this regard. Not everyone is. This isn’t some fear about the globalization monster coming to destroy us all. It is more about finding a way to preserve some of that sense of place – those things that help to make where we live a community.

Springing Forth

New buds against a cloudless northwest sky.

New buds against a cloudless northwest sky.

Something wonderful happens on a sunny early spring day here in the Northwest. Something besides the flat out wonderfulness that is a sunny early spring day. We all seem to get a spring in our step as well. I walked to the store this afternoon, reveling in the sunshine and chance for a natural vitamin D boost; passing many of the same people I see out walking dogs, out picking up kids, just out – the same people who will mumble a greeting in return when I grumble a greeting towards them. Today, however, in the sun and the warmth and the promise of the buds on the bare tree limbs we all greeted each other with hearty, happy exultations on the beauty of the day. They usual “morning” or “afternoon” became “How are you today?” returned with an enthusiastic “wonderful!” often followed by a comment on how gorgeous it was, how blue the sky, how warm the sun, the miracle of sprouting bulbs and early blooms.

Instead of the begrudging pulling aside of the cart blocking the aisle, of the curt ‘excuse me’ issued to get to some item on a shelf; today the shop was filled with smiling people who apologized for being in the way (even when they weren’t), who went out of their way to help someone who couldn’t quite reach (and thanks to the lovely gentleman who grabbed the olive oil for me), and who burbled to clerks trapped behind counters that they really needed to get outside. Soon. The usual bustle and business of my favorite market was transformed into something bordering on festive. I swear I was waiting for a musical number to break out in the middle of the produce section.

In the dark and wet months we charge from car to shop and back. We put our heads down and move smartly through the wet and cold to get to the warm dry; and for good reason. Today we looked up and at each other. We smiled and we laughed and we reveled in the sun, a spring in our step.

I went out for a long walk yesterday afternoon. The sun was out, and while it was cold it, well – sun. It was windy, but I have never really minded the wind. I grew up in a place where wind was a near daily event; a desert valley where the wind seemed to gear up at one end to make a mad dash to the other. Not a fan of blowing dust or sand as a result, but wind in and of itself has always been rather comforting to me. There is something peaceful in the sound of the branches creaking, in the rustle of leaves, even in the howling of a storm.

Walking in the wind in the early afternoon, I began to really hear all of the sounds around me. The rhythmic flapping of a flag creating a percussion line to the quiet whoosh of the air. The gentle rattle of a loose street sign gave a bit of reverb to it all. A lazy crow, floating on the currents was both discordant and striking in contrast to it all. And then, of course, the wind itself like a muted version of the ocean upon the shore. It was a really amazing symphony to me, a peaceful chorus of man and nature.

Granted, we try to tart up such things with our own additions. A neighbor a few doors down appears to have an inordinate fondness for wind chimes. They hang from her porch eaves, drip from hooks in a post, from hooks in the planter boxes; she adds to these all manner of spinners and wind socks so that in a decent breeze the whole place looks rather like a demented miniature fair. Walking past on a day like today is somewhat akin to wandering into a really bad warmup of a less than stellar brass band. I can’t imagine what it must be like to live with that, to have that outside the door.

It made me wonder what it was about the wind this person was trying to harness or deflect. A single wind chime is fine, almost zen if the tone is right. But that many? I wonder if the howl of the wind is frightening and this an attempt to make it less so. Maybe it is a way to push away silence. A chance to feel less lonely. A lot of us are uncomfortable in the silence.

For me silence works just fine. It gives me time to slow down, to think, to ponder. But mostly I find that silence is rarely silent. There is always something, from the wind to the general hum that seems to always be in the background, sounds are around us pretty much constantly. Perhaps we can learn something about ourselves by looking at what sounds we seek out, even in the silence.